Saturday, September 17, 2016

If you can fall in love, why not fall in hate?

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I'm sure you've heard people say "I fell in love" (or you've probably said it yourself), but have you ever heard anyone say "I fell in hate" when asked why they do not like someone? Why is that? Why do people only (according to them) "fall in love", but never "fall in hate"?

I've reflected on this "I fell in love" line that we seem to throw around a lot, and I think you don't "fall" in love with someone. Or put better, you don't "fall" into real, true love; you choose decide to love.

If you can "fall" in love, why don't you "fall" in hate, too? They are opposites, aren't they? If you can fall into one, you should be able to fall into the other, right? But I'm yet to hear anyone say I fell in hate with so and so...or have you? Rather, you hear things like "I hate so and so".

The kind of love you fall into is the kind you "walk" out of when you rise on your feet from your initial "fall". I mean, people don't generally remain on the ground after they fall, or would they? They'd most likely get back up!

Falling is not a deliberate, voluntary decision; no one ever wishes or sets the goal of falling; no one in their right mind would say, "my goal is to fall". So, you don't fall in love, you choose to... you decide to.

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What love is not
Love is NOT a feeling; love is NOT infatuation; love is NOT a "crush"; love is NOT lust, or that "butterflies in the belly" is NOT all of these! Love is NOT something you fall into.

That kind of love (which you "fall" into) is based on feelings; it's based on 'how she makes me feel when I'm around her', 'how he makes the hair at the back of my head stand up', or 'how it seems nothing else in the world matters when we hold hands' - that's all feelings, that's why you fall into it.

But real love is much more than that. Love is giving and forgiving... Love is a decision - a conscious, deliberate one.
God so loved the world that He gave His only without giving is only theory. Love that fails to find expression in practical terms through giving and forgiving is not real love. Love that is built on feelings is like the weather that changes with the season.

I'm sure God didn't feel like it, but He demonstrated His love for us and GAVE His son, Jesus up for mankind...

I'm sure He didn't feel like it, but He FORGAVE us our sins even before we recognised we were in sin...

I'm sure Jesus didn't feel like it, but He ENDURED the shame (and pain) of the cross to restore us to our place of relationship with God...

I'm sure Jesus felt betrayed by Peter's denial, yet He RESTORED and ENCOURAGED him...

God didn't feel like it, yet He gave and forgave - that's love as it should be!
Love is giving, love is forgiving, love is sharing, love is enduring, love encourages, love restores, love is a decision that drives action; it can involve emotions (such as compassion), but is not BASED on it. So, then, you can't fall in love.

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